Why Would Whitney Leave The Hills?

So Jezebel is obsessed with The Hills and how Whitney might be leaving the show. Actually, Jezebel says that Star Magazine says that Whitney's getting kicked off the show for being "too vanilla."

But since Whitney seems to be the only Hills character without a learning disability, we root for her place on MTV's unreality show... even if she does lead us into occasional heartbreak, like when she dated the lame personal trainer for half an episode, or when she wore skinny Acne jeans with a yellow smiley faced tunic that wishes it were Jeremy Scott.

Otherwise, Whitney is our beacon, and we made some California phone calls to find out what's actually happening with our shining star.

Please note that nobody at Teen Vogue contributed to our Whitney Watch because they're all sworn to Hills secrecy... but here's what we heard from other sources...

1. Star Magazine is misinformed; Whitney isn't going anywhere. This wouldn't be the first time the tabloid's gotten something wrong, and whether you believe their Hills gossip may depend on whether you believe their other big blonde story - that Mary Kate had a coke habit and not anorexia...

2. Whitney doesn't want to share more of her personal life; the producers need more conflict in their co-stars. There's only so long we can watch Heidi and Spencer snarl and snap (as evidenced by Monday's boring episode). Soon, Lauren will need new negative energy, and Whitney's just too normal, and too unwilling to share her real drama with millions of viewers. When she was offered the chance to move in with Lauren and Audrina this season, she declined, and her boyfriend E! correspondent Ben Lyons, has never appeared on the show - which is too bad, since he's adorable and smart, and uses less hair gel than Spencer (though not much, if we're being truthful). Anyway, if Whitney can't participate in The Hills drama, the producers need someone who can, and Whitney might be ready for a real job as a fashion assistant anyway. Which leads to...

3. There's a rumor that Whitney's been interviewing for a position at W Magazine. We can't confirm it, we're sure W won't confirm it, but we do know that Whitney's worked at W once before, as a West Coast intern. Also, W also recently interviewed another girl from another reality show to be a staffer, but we're not getting into that...

4. There is no number four. We can't believe we've actually written a post about this. Gossip Girl better be damn good tonight...