When we heard from our Inbox that Puma and Sergio Rossi were collaborating on a capsule collection to be sold at Colette starting January, we got excited. We like Sergio. We like Puma. We love Colette. So this should work.

But:

They’re sneaker-heels. The last time I wore sneaker-heels, I was about ten and going through my Spice Girl phase - since then, I thought we all decided any sort of shoe that tries to combine high-heels with sneakers was out of the question, so much to our surprise, Sergio and Puma are doing just that.

We’re not exactly sure where one wears sneakettos, but we do know that considering the purple satin lace-ups and Mary-Janes with gummy white soles, we won’t be wearing the collection anytime soon.

It’s too bad. We love the parts (Sergio, Puma, Colette), but the sum, well, we’ll save our kicks cash for Lacroix + Gola.

—HAYLEY PHELAN