My Barbie World: Part I

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This afternoon, I died and went to pre-adolescent fashion heaven. I walked among fifty models, fifty little girls, more hair extensions than they used on Cousin It, trays and trays of plastic nails and some seriously awesome clothes backstage at Barbie's 50th birthday party. Charlotte Tilbury directed the make-up artists through their three looks: Retro Barbie (red lip lacquer and "visor-like" lashes), Present Day Barbie (sparkly pink lids and fabulously teased hair) and Future Barbie, with braided up-dos and insanely feathered glittery eyelids. Stila's make-up artist promised me that, "It's all wearable, you just have to find your era and maybe bring it down a teeny tiny notch." Uh-huh. Post make-up, I snuck past the dressers and into the rails, tucked myself between Marchesa's frothy number and Alex Wang's rhinestoned leotard and took pictures of the hot pink patent Louboutins lining the ground- it took all of my self control not to accidently slip Vlada's into my clutch And then I met Ken. He and his unreal blonde highlights introduced me to Miranda. The six-year-old held her own between Behati and Jourdan in the make-up chairs. I asked her if she was excited to walk a runway. She looked at me, confused and I said, "Is this your first fashion show?" "No," she answered politely, though she gave Ken a knowing look. "I'm a model. Last time I was on a runway I got to wear ballet flats and they put pompoms in my hair," she told me before getting swept into her tutu. And that was my cue to take my seat - Part II very soon.