posted by shharvin

Apr 17, 2009 11:26AM

I wouldn't care if someone i didn't know disliked my outfit. If a friend who knows about fashion says something, I may think about ways I could make the look more wearable. But if I really love a look, I won't care what other people think about it. Normally the haters will be wearing what they're making fun of in two years anyways. Take skinny jeans, for example. They appeared on the runways like 4 years ago, and they didn't really become widely popular until like 2 years ago.

posted by sambelle

Apr 17, 2009 11:32AM

thank you for addressing this fashionista...i've been dealing with this problem since high school. I guess the thing that is most depressing is the clothes that I get major compliments on from close friends and co-workers, who "get it"... i get insults from acquaintances and strangers that just dont get it. But deep down I know it's not their fault...they've never even heard the names Balmain, Yves Saint Laurent, or Givenchy...I think that us in the fashion crowd are just in another dimension when it comes to dressing..

posted by Jac

Apr 17, 2009 11:58AM

I really enjoy Carson's posts. Interesting, fun, well written. Keep him around!

posted by guest

Apr 17, 2009 12:04PM

Here is some Old Person wisdom for you:

Usually when someone is making a snide remark on your clothes, they are trying to make you feel bad. I've responded to mean remarks a variety of ways, but the best response I've found is to smile and respond positively.

Example: "You look like a linebacker in those shoulder pads." Response: (smile) "Oh, how funny!" or "Do you want me to get you a tailor to sew up your jeans?" Response: (smile) "No thank you!"

Smiling and responding (sometimes you can't ignore the person) is usually the best way to show someone that they aren't getting to you. Now, if this is a friend who likes to rib on your outfits for comical effect, I would probably respond with something witty. But usually a smile and something like "How funny!" or "Oh, really?" stings the person more than any screaming insult or nasty look could.

posted by guest

Apr 17, 2009 12:15PM

I'm totally immune! Funny enough I don't really like nice comments either especially when it's from a stranger....I don't know why but I just don't.

posted by guest

Apr 17, 2009 12:20PM

Usually the people who have something to say wear really boring clothing, are close minded insecure jerks who wouldnt be able to pull it off.

fuck em.

posted by guest

Apr 17, 2009 12:26PM

I usually say something like, "Well, when you stop buying your clothes at Chico's, then you can comment on how I dress."
I say it slowly,with a slight smile.

posted by guest

Apr 17, 2009 12:33PM

I have definitely gotten called out, recently for my metallic blue repetto jazz shoes, and for wearing denim on denim... I just tell them that I'm not afraid to be fashion forward and neither should they be!

posted by guest

Apr 17, 2009 12:50PM

Usually the person commenting is not someone whom I would ever take any advice from. In high school I would get really bent out of shape. I feel worse in Jeans and a T. I hate blending in.

posted by guest

Apr 17, 2009 1:03PM

If it's a stranger on the street then I ignore them, if it's someone I know, I throw out a witty remark... or ignore it. http://isnotfashion.blogspot.com

posted by guest

Apr 17, 2009 1:04PM

To Jac: fyi Carson is a femme.

But in response to the question...I've never really had that happen to me but I definitely question what other people wear..hopefully that doesn't sound too mean hehe.

posted by guest

Apr 17, 2009 1:06PM

Carson Griffith real name is Megan Griffith a Pittsburgh transplant to NYC. Girl not boy, so give the girl her due credit for some great comments

posted by guest

Apr 17, 2009 1:11PM

This reminds me of this week's episode of The Hills when Spencer caught sight of his sister's conductor hat and asked if she left her train outside. Although I didn't care for the hat, I couldn't help but sympathize - my brother would have said the same thing to me.

posted by guest

Apr 17, 2009 1:39PM

I wore an amazing and beloved Rick Owens jacket to my work holiday party and one of my colleagues, who looks as if he hasn't bought anything new since 1993, told me that I was wearing an interesting quilt and laughed. Someone else said I looked cozy and gave me a sympathetic and condescending smile, while trying to poke me. I deftly avoided her little paws and nicely said to them both, "You have no idea, do you." Then I stomped off to the wine bar with a defiant cat walk saunter.

posted by guest

Apr 17, 2009 1:51PM

Maybe it's because in the eyes of many, fashionistas actually look pretty ridiculous. It's like speaking a language that only a few others speak. The clothes you wear are only interesting and fashion forward to others that speak the same language but to anyone else, they look kind of silly. Be as proud as you like about the clothes you wear and feel as superior as you like, but also maybe accept that you sometimes appear as if the circus has landed. You can feel smug and superior, but at least allow others the pleasure of commenting on it!

posted by guest

Apr 17, 2009 1:57PM

Comment 15- "You have no idea, do you"? Nice comeback there.

posted by guest

Apr 17, 2009 2:14PM

i have those big white dior moonboots/snowboots and i rock them around brooklyn nyc and long island i have never worn them without getting at least 1 random comment (whether positive or negative) from strangers...my constant response, thank you and have a nice day, smile, keep walking

posted by etoilee8

Apr 17, 2009 2:21PM

16 are you kidding? Even if I had no interests in fashion what-so-ever, I would still give a thumbs up to people who look different rather than snicker and point. Why the hell should we give people the pleasure of trying to make someone else feel bad? I don't walk up to people and go "oooh your jeans, how very '99". Or even better "she could be a farm-er in those clothes". So why the hell do these uniformed assholes think they can point and laugh at someone else for wearing what they please? What's more ridiculous is the same person pointing at someone elses' look will swear in the next breath that they "like love fashion and read Vogue regularly". Are you actually reading those magazines or just caring them around for the sake of looking informed?

posted by guest

Apr 17, 2009 2:26PM

I DO NOT know what I would do!?!
I mean I'm trying something new OK!
Seriously, I could use a compliment...so if you have nothing nice to say don't say anything at all!!
Plus, don't you think you'll look better with all your teeth intact!

posted by guest

Apr 17, 2009 2:37PM

I agree with #16. Props to those able to wear cutting-edge fashion, but don't except everyone to get it. Some people with think you look awesome, and some will think you look silly. Either way, people are taking notice, so laugh it off and be proud of what you're wearing!

posted by guest

Apr 17, 2009 2:42PM

To quote myself :

Fashion is a sport, don't play if you are afraid to get hurt.

posted by guest

Apr 17, 2009 2:46PM

It seems fairly obvious to me that if you are wearing something to be unique and stand out from the crowd, then there will be some in the crowd who will notice and say something. People comment on things that are different. You should expect it, and either grow a thicker skin about it, or wear things that you like enough, and are confident enough in, to not care what other people think. Or at least be able to put on a show of confidence about what you are wearing, even if deep down you may be a little unsure.

posted by guest

Apr 17, 2009 2:53PM

When i get those comments, it's because someone is trying to cut me down for being into fashion. I usually just look at their outfit up and down and turn away without saying anything.

posted by etoilee8

Apr 17, 2009 2:53PM

I just think it's rude when people point at others. Do we really live in such a small society that we have to tear someone else down to feel better about ourselves? In all honesty, I really don't care anymore what people think of my clothing. It used to hurt when I was in high school and girls would point and laugh at something which I loved. People have gotten better about the pointing and laughing situation (probably because I walk tough like I will kick someone's ass). But for the most part, the pointing and laughing doesn't occur anymore whether I'm wearing Rick Owens or Viv Westwood. The absolutely best thing is when someone with style completely different from mine, walks up sheepishly and says "I like your _____". That makes me grin from ear to ear.

posted by Jac

Apr 17, 2009 3:34PM

ok, Carson is a girl. I was thinking to myself, how is a guy so good at this?! Good job, girl!

posted by guest

Apr 17, 2009 3:41PM

ahh! this just happened to me today! how weird! i was walking in the hallway at school and two girls were walking behind me talking about how much they hated my shoes. they were like, "i don't understand why people wear shoes like that! they're so ugly." and i don't know them from adam, so i don't think they have anything against me personally...

posted by penneya

Apr 17, 2009 3:43PM

#24 has the best advice, a dirty look can say so much more than words.I find that 95% of the time it has nothing to do with actually disliking that persons outfit or a particular item, it's usually always about jealousy or insecurity... if you need to make other people feel inferior to make your day a little brighter, you are the one I pity.

But I also have to say that just because something is a trend doesn't mean it works on everyone and if you're following along with the trend of the season and it doesn't work on you... you're probably being ridiculed for looking bad, not for the item or trend in particular.

posted by arue

Apr 17, 2009 4:03PM

I usually don't care much if it's someone I know most of my friends have a love hate relationship with my outfits. When a stranger says something it does bother me. I don't like being judged before someone knows me. Like right now as I type this on my phone a guy is looking at my outfit and shaking his head. He surely approves of the oversize T but not my mid-thigh shorts

posted by guest

Apr 17, 2009 4:05PM

Thanks for the post - I can definitely identify - the first time I wore my Phillip Lim 3.1 Harem Tuxedo pants to the office my co-workers started singing MC Hammers 'Cant Touch This' - a little annoying but overall I counldnt really care less... That same co-worker ended up in London a few weeks later and had to admit that he was wrong when he saw the same type of pants all over the streets... All in all, if fashion was safe, it wouldnt be much fun, would it?

posted by guest

Apr 17, 2009 5:51PM

I'm going to wear harem pants no matter what anyone says...

PS: Carson's family lives down the street from me in Boston!

posted by guest

Apr 17, 2009 7:12PM

I think my response would TOTALLY depend on the looks of the comment source.

I mean, if they look really chic I might feel the cut, but otherwise?

Please.

posted by guest

Apr 17, 2009 7:39PM

"well, i have a huge penis."

posted by Malibu

Apr 17, 2009 8:10PM

Sorry 16 but I completely disagree. I think it actually does matter what "non fashion" people say, because even though they don't live in FashionLand, it doesn't mean they don't have...well eyes and a brain. Not all trends can transition from runway to street and if it looks ugly and silly, chances are you look ugly and silly as well! There's a big difference between having a sense of fashion and a sense of style.

posted by guest

Apr 17, 2009 8:31PM

I have to agree with Guest #16. While I was in college everyone would talk about a girl who always had fashion foward style, while the rest of them wore American Eagle everyday.

Its wrong to sniker about people, but its also sad that none of those people who talk about fashionista's are willing to take explore their own style instead of following everyone.

posted by etoilee8

Apr 17, 2009 8:54PM

Sorry Malibu but you're wrong about people looking "ugly and silly". First of all, I would never say someone looks "ugly and silly", no matter what their style may be. Just because I don't like it, doesn't mean someone else doesn't. Trends take a long time to get used to. As Shharvin mentioned about skinny jeans. You know how many people looked at me funny for rocking those back in 2004? A LOT. Now I can hardly stand the sight of them and have reverted to wide legs, baggy and high waisted mostly. And like 30, my sister and my brother-in-law sing "Can't Touch This" every time I wear my harem pants. But it's all good fun because I'm laughing with them and my sister tells me that she admires my guts and knows sooner or later everyone else will buy into the style. Most fashion forward people are exactly that. Ahead of the mainstream. But the sheep with malicious intent should keep their comments to themselves, unless they want to be ripped apart. "Oh, someone alert the press S/S 2009 is all about mom jeans and hoodies". But then, I'd be called a "snob". It's total reverse snobbery, that's what it is. Picking on someone because you're perhaps a bit jealous and closed minded . . .

posted by kelleyd

Apr 17, 2009 10:23PM

A little Q & A:

Q: Honey, what are you wearing?
A: MAGIC!
Q: Honey, no, that skirt is ridiculous.
A: I know!
(A big smile. A laugh. An exit.)

I dress for myself. I have fun doing it. Isn't that the point?--to construct a sort of looking glass that bends the world into something altogether more beautiful than what it really is?

We just have to get the Qs to see things from our perspective.
And really, people (especially girls!) just want to have fun! If you're having fun, a small part of them probably wants to get in on the joke.
At the very least, you turn into one of those really, really mysterious girls who give those really, really mysterious, over-the-shoulder smiles to all the cute boys they bump into on the street.
And even if you don't, what do you care? You've already made your exit.

posted by xnoelle25

Apr 17, 2009 10:24PM

So, today I threw on some creme colored lace tights, my usual studded rings and leather watch, black shorts, a baggy short black dress with a large bow in the front, and five inch stilettos (with 1 1/2 inch platforms. I was going to change, but two of my housemates told me not to. They insisted that I looked super cute and forward so I went with it.. take in mind that they're pretty mainstream in the fashion dept.

Later, I ran into a friend who commented on my outfit and told me that I look like a gothic version of Alice In Wonderland.

Glad I could inspire him in some sort of way.

posted by guest

Apr 17, 2009 10:42PM

I think everyone needs to harden the fuck up;

I know of a girl with the most amazing style ever - she looks like she gets dressed by Rei Kawakubo every morning. She's never applied for a job in her life and she was approached in the street to work at Easton Pearson, then by a boutique which sells like hussein chalayan, ann sofie back etc... and now she's getting paid loads to be the door bitch at this amazing cocktail lounge, and her job is to judge everyone at the door and turn away those with bad style - whilst being a stylist for SONY BMG records in Australia

So I think the moral of the story is; If you suck it in long enough, then it pays off eventually.

posted by austinsamuel

Apr 17, 2009 10:54PM

I hate attention from the wrong people. And i hate the way they comment on things, like as if they think I need their validation. Basically, I hate people who don't know how the world works, and I hate people who are naive about fashion. OHHHH especially when someone with really bad style goes and buys something, and when they try and explain their purchase they say something is really "IN" at the moment, and i look at them like "you are such, such, a fucking moron".
OR ESPECIALLY when someone says "that pattern on that dress is so much like what the designer of emilio pucci makes" when they have no idea that Peter Dundas took over from Williamson, and took pucci in a completely different direction.

People just shouldn't open their mouth hey..

posted by austinsamuel

Apr 17, 2009 10:56PM

Can you guys block the handbag princess taking over the comment section PUHHHHLEASEEEE

posted by cesarcmma

Apr 17, 2009 11:57PM

^^PLEASEEEEEEE

I agree, is so annoying

posted by Britt Aboutaleb

Apr 18, 2009 12:15AM

sorry guys! i did yesterday, she must've gotten a new IP address...grrr

posted by guest

Apr 18, 2009 2:57AM

If the person who is criticizing me is wearing Juicy Couture (as they often are), I just laugh and walk away. Girls in velour tracksuits are not allowed to say that I'm the one who looks bad.

posted by Suzanne aka Punk Glam Queen

Apr 18, 2009 10:08AM

This actually came up the other day with my 9 year old daughter (she loves to play with fashion, and already has a great style.) I told her when someone says something negative to her to respond with "Wissen ist Macht" with a smile on her face. It translates to "wisdom is power", and for the most part leaves people with their tongues hanging down because they are shocked that you responded, and even though they think they are superior and you are nuts/ lame/ whatever, you still trump them by leaving them even more confused. I happen to find the saying quite appropriate in these types of situations, after all if the person saying something had a clue would they go around making negative comments about people's choices of adornment? Usually leaves them scratching their bums (where their brains reside.)

posted by Mlle_Frou_Frou

Apr 18, 2009 12:15PM

i get that kind of response too...especially from the men in my life. it's frustrating, but then again, i try to look at it as an opportunity to educate them about what's in style!
xoxx

posted by guest

Apr 18, 2009 12:32PM

Fenique here!! When I was younger I would feel bad but now that I'm grown and living my life depending on me...I have to say I no longer care. It's my belief in life that "I do me and everyone else can watch!!!" lol! That means I'm gonna dress anad look how I want while everyone else just sits back and looks on! I always tell those haters that maybe if they stepped their fashion game up they'd know what real fashion is about!! LOL I'm not conceited I'm just real bold and careless about other ppls comments cuz what I'm wearing right now they will be wearing in about 6 months.

posted by theinfamouslizblack

Apr 18, 2009 1:44PM

Honestly, fashion is about expressing yourself and having fun... The uninformed and unfashionable people will ALWAYS make comments...

In the past when people have made negative comments about anything I'm wearing I typically arch an eyebrow, give a little smirk and ask them why they feel that their lack of personal style actually gives them the ability to make snide remarks about my outfit.

Also, I hate "Worst Dressed Lists". I think the people who truly belong on those lists are the lazy people who don't make an effort.

posted by guest

Apr 18, 2009 5:03PM

my outfits are far from normal at my highschool. however the majority of people who say anything are always complimenting, which makes me feel really good. :] haha there are however a few times when negative comment have been thrown out. Like when people tell me "you look like..."I normally just respond in a serious tone, "that's what i was going for" and smile.

posted by guest

Apr 18, 2009 6:50PM

Some of you guys sound ridiculous!

"I hate people who don't know how the world works, and I hate people who are naive about fashion." Ummm austinsamuel some people are busy doing other things than finding out that Peter took Pucci in a completely different direction. Get over yourself, you sound like a right snob!

"I think that us in the fashion crowd are just in another dimension when it comes to dressing.." sambelle

wow, just wow. lol i agree with most of these comments but these two sound so smug and suprieor! get off your high-horses!

posted by guest

Apr 18, 2009 10:00PM

I'm a total bitch...I eye the offender up and down and then in the most ice queen tone say

"That would normally hurt my feeling but seeing as you are devoid of style and have no clue who Margiela is...sigh I don't think you really ought to comment."

posted by guest

Apr 19, 2009 12:11AM

Guest #5 and a few others have the right idea. Just let it roll off your back (this advice applies to pretty much everything else too). Remember the compliments when you get them. Ultimately, if you're happy with your outfit, that's all that matters.

In fact, I wish I had more guts to approach random people and compliment their style... I truly appreciate their efforts to make the world a little more interesting.

posted by fashionjunkie

Apr 19, 2009 8:43AM

what i don't like about these comments, is that they assume their opinion is correct/authoritative/welcomed/relevant. it's the arrogance that bothers me. why would i care about your opinion? why do you give it to me? do you think it's constructive & you will save me from fashion ruin?

i would rather be appreciated for what i wear by a few people "in the know" than the masses. like you guys all point out, it's much better to be appreciated by those who know margiela or rick owens. who cares if a banana republic-wearing person loves your outfit? you want the fiercest of the fierce to give you the appreciative/approving smile.

posted by austinsamuel

Apr 19, 2009 9:47AM

Guest @ # 51 - You're completely right, I sound so completely up myself. But someone had to take one for the team.

I just can't stand it when people get angry at me for taking fashion seriously, It's like get fucked. If you're too busy to know something like that, then learn to take it.

posted by austinsamuel

Apr 19, 2009 9:49AM

PS - Britt, it means heaps that you responded to my comment. I died. Seriously haha

posted by guest

Apr 19, 2009 5:56PM

I didnt find my REAL love for fashion until I was in college. I have always been the type to be "dressed up" as some call it. I dont consider black pants and nice shirt an effort or "dressed up" but some people really dont "get" it. I went to a college where every girl wore Juicy jumpsuits, uggs or anything abercrombie and fitch they could get their paws on. I stuck out quite obviously. Stilettos, black pants, dresses, whatever to 9am classes I wore what I LIKED. My lack of conformity made me realize not only just how much I loved fashion but how okay I was with myself and what I wore. I constantly had friends ask me why i was so "dressed up" and Id laugh and say "You think this is dressed up? I was trying to figure out why you're wearing your pajamas to class. My mother would kill me." My mom probably really couldnt care but to be witty was the best comeback without being snobby. As time went on and people saw me more and more they'd compliment me and eventually instead of critizing my differences they began to inquire about advice. Even in high school a girl actually told me I was a snobby rich bi**h because I was dressed up all the time and thought I was better than everyone. I laughed at her too, and said " Thats funny my pants are from Mandees they cost me $15 and I bought them myself, whats rich about that, dont hate me because you're not comfortable with yourself." and walked away, she apologized a week later. Love what you love and always be polite and poised, even if you DO wear track suits if you believe in what youre wearing I mean at least be able to back it up otherwise maybe YOU should take a second look before you go out in public or especially for you open your mouth.

posted by guest

Apr 20, 2009 5:41PM

wtf guest 56 just blew all your asses out of the water.

posted by sidechic

Apr 21, 2009 12:49PM

don't you just love it when people make funny remarks about what you wear??
i really do! i find it soo sweet! and more to the point, doesn't that mean you have made an impression?..and isn't that what most of us want to do?
So why complain? Especially if the remarks is made by someone that is not into fashion at all, don't you just feel like hugging them and give them a kiss on the forhead.
I do.
They don't know any better...and they don't know they don't know...
As far as a respones to the remarks my advice is: just a smile and a wink.
After all :" noblesse oblige..."
x

posted by evei59

Apr 21, 2009 1:12PM

HAHA don't take yourself so seriously! You need to have a sense of humor. (And Brothers don't know anything as loveable as they are.) Does it really matter what anyone else thinks anyway?... It shouldn't, especially if you are a true trendsetter.

posted by guest

Apr 21, 2009 1:46PM

Great post!! I most definitely dress for myself and have an eclectic style which often elicits comments from others. I usually smile and laugh off the comment, as in "Those earrings are the same size as your head! Me: I know! Arent' they great??!" If that only encourages them, then remind people that all good fashion slightly borders on the ridiculous :)

posted by neenersh

Apr 22, 2009 2:27PM

This always is an issue, from my older brothers to even some of my girlfriends (for shame!) I go out of my apt. feeling confident and chic and then someone has to make some under-cut comment even if they KNOW it's fabulous and they still make some snarky comment. I try to tell them it's fab but sometimes it's still a little annoying. I agree with being confident about it, but anyone who says that it doesn't bother them even a little is full of it.

posted by neenersh

Apr 22, 2009 2:28PM

This always is an issue, from my older brothers to even some of my girlfriends (for shame!) I go out of my apt. feeling confident and chic and then someone has to make some under-cut comment even if they KNOW it's fabulous and they still make some snarky comment. I try to tell them it's fab but sometimes it's still a little annoying. I agree with being confident about it, but anyone who says that it doesn't bother them even a little is full of it.

posted by guest

May 04, 2009 12:25PM

To be honest, I'm completely used to snotty remarks and snarky comments. Sometimes I don't feel like my outfit is a success if I don't get at least a few strange looks!

http://radio-clash.net

posted by RashomonRebel

May 04, 2009 12:40PM

It has never happened to me because I look fucking fierce all of the fucking time! BTW, I would like Britt to wear these and walk the block of Wooster between Spring and Prince around 5 pm every day.

http://www.style.com/slideshows/fashionshows/S2008RTW/MMARGIEL/RUNWAY/00170m.jpg

posted by marichon

May 04, 2009 1:46PM

On a related note, if anyone is still reading this post: Do the kind of jeans in the picture end up wearing out really fast? Because if those strings holding the hole together rip, then basically your hole leg is hanging out and the jeans would be REALLY hard to wear. There is a pair I want to get but not if they will rip right away. Any advice?