Okay, not to beat the dead horse on perfume. But when we read in WWD that both Demi Moore and Fergie are launching fragrances, we must write something.

Let’s start with Fergie. I will fully admit that as much as I wanted to hate Fergie Ferg, The Dutchess had some really catchy ass songs on it. “Big Girls Don’t Cry”, anyone? Do I ever, ever think I want to smell like her? That would be a big old no.

So Avon, I’m not really getting where you’re coming from. Reese, I get. This…not even one little bit. Also, will it have a name as inane and meaningless as Black Eyed Peas lyrics have become? Seriously if there is one called Boom Boom and one called Pow, I can’t be held responsible for my actions.

On another fragrant front, who knew Helena Rubinstein was still in business? I’m a beauty girl and I thought it was long gone. Nope, it’s around and Demi Moore is the face of its first fragrance in 26 years according to WWD.

Again, not seeing the marketing potential outside of Demi’s Twitter here (and even that isn’t exactly screaming luxury fragrance). Used to love the brand. Really have nothing against Demi. But the relevance of either one at this point is a big old question mark.

Feel free to tell me why you think I’m wrong. But I think you’ll have a hard time convincing me either of these choices is spot-on.