“Gwyneth Paltrow is the product of a joint partnership between Williams Sonoma, Crate & Barrel, and Ina Garten to make us all jealous and want to buy their wealthy white folks summery breezy lifestyle products. There is no Gwyneth Paltrow.” –Gawker’s Richard Lawson on Jeffrey Steingarten’s wet kiss article about Gorgeous Gwyneth in American Vogue.