He’s a benefactor of beauty queens, an egomaniac, the patron saint of the now-defunct “birther” movement, and super rich. Of COURSE we want to smell like him! WWD reports this morning that The Donald is in talks with Five Star Fragrances to launch a scent potentially called Success by Trump.

Trump made a foray into the fragrance business back in 2004 when he released Donald Trump the Fragrance with Estee Lauder. Shockingly, it didn’t do well. You can still find it at deep discount prices on the internet. Oh, the irony.

We found an old quote about Donald Trump the Fragrance on our favorite scent site, Basenotes: “The scent is designed to smell of money and according to Trump, ‘[this] will be the best men’s scent availalble.’” Well, at least until Tom Ford came along and ruined it for him.

What will this new fragrance smell like? Unisex juice is de rigeur now, so maybe he’ll go that route. The bottle will undoubtedly be gold-toned, large, and most likely phallic. Also, maybe it will have a comb over.

Who on earth will actually purchase and wear this?