1. Can Kristen Cavallari answer the age old question: “How do you keep from going from reality show to reality show?” (You don’t! The reality TV vortex is inescapable!).
2. Mario Lopez WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?
3. Wait, more fan involvement? And they’re dumping on Alexandria again! So… why is she still here?
4. “I know how to conduct myself—bitch, I worked at a bank!” Are you serious, Angelea?
5. Jay, what “fashion boundary” is your black-and-white striped decal shirt pushing? Hot Topic?
6. So Bianca is this season’s crier?
7. Whoa, so let’s be real: which agency is gonna snap up Allison? Girl is killin’ it.
8. Did Tyra just parody a SNL parody of herself? Unironically? And I wonder what she thinks about when she gets dressed?
9. André and Tyra—stop trying to make “booty tooch” happen, because it’s never, ever gonna happen. When did that even become a word anyway?
10. Producers, can you please try to be less blatant about the photo filtering? These are NOT the best shots possible. Where is Isis’ one-legged stilt stand? Or Alexandria’s jump?