Rule No. 2: Don’t sit on the stairs. Or the displays. Or the floor. This one might seem obvious to most people, but you’d be shocked at the number of customers (or more aptly, human remoras) who so casually, and sometimes defiantly, plant themselves on whichever flat surface they come across when their weary limbs can no longer commit.
Some select responses I’ve received upon politely asking a floor/stair/display-sitter to please stand: “Why.” “No.” “Go get your manager.” “Well where the hell am I supposed to sit?!”
Look, if anyone understands how exhausting it gets walking slowly in a figure-eight pattern, it’s us– try doing it for eight hours at a time. But our sales floor isn’t your living room, or a lounge. Therefore, it’s not our duty to provide your lazy caboose with a couch. Sitting on a display could cause one of our fancy mannequins to topple. The floor is filthy– see how dirty all our merch is after it’s been dragged around? And sitting on an active staircase is pretty much the definition of a safety hazard. Do you honestly want people to die because you were blocking the fire exit??? Think about the children!