Kate Upton and P. Diddy are maybe probably definitely dating because of course they are.
According to the New York Daily News, Upton, the babeliest bikini-clad tourist Antarctica has ever known was seen “sucking face” with the 43-year-old hip hop mogul during a hot n’ heavy Miami club rendezvous March 24. Upton is 20.
And the tryst didn’t stop there: The following Thursday night, while you were at home in your apartment watching The Big Bang Theory with your dog, Kate Upton and P. Diddy were adorably sharing a single strand of spaghetti during an “intimate dinner” at the Bowery Hotel in SoHo. Or, as the NYDN‘s source so eloquently puts it, “They were having dinner together.”
Diddy, née Sean Combs, was allegedly spotted house hunting in LA with Delia*s model-turned-R ‘n’ B singer-turned P. Diddy’s girlfriend Cassie way, way back in January. Upton recently parted ways with an athlete I’ve never heard of named Justin Verlander. The model is currently sustaining a one-sided relationship with every straight male on Earth and possibly beyond.
Of the quick-moving couple (potential names: DiddyUp? Cat Diddy? P. Dougie? Pupton?), Upton’s rep had this to say: “They met once a year ago and there’s no further relationship at this point.” To which we say, no one’s going to miss you at the wedding, sweetie.