Back in 2010, former Fashionista editor Britt Aboutaleb was forwarded the most amazing email of the century: A ridiculous memo regarding sorority rush fashion requirements from the Cornell chapter of Pi Phi. It actually included the phrases “NO camel toe” and “I won’t tolerate any gross plastic shizzzz” — and it immediately went viral. (If you missed it, we highly recommend giving it a full read.)
Now, it looks like such infantile behavior isn’t limited to the ladies, as a similar email on the subject of “frat fashion” has emerged from Emory University in Atlanta. The folks at Business Insider got their hands on the whole thing, and it’s hilarious.
We wouldn’t say that bros are an authority on male style, but the “Apparel Chair” (there’s no way that can be a real position, right?) of this particular chapter seems to think that he’s a regular Glenn O’Brien. This Fratshionistau, as he calls himself, has decided to start a weekly fashion column for his brothers to help set them all “on the correct path to being a frat fashionista.” For instance, he outlines the season’s hottest trends for his sartorially-challenged buddies:
What is in this season? Glad you asked.
Earthy Tones: Can’t go wrong with mama earth’s natural beauty, or even plaid (Blake you are in luck). Extra points if you can incorporate Burgundy.
Cuffed Paints: whether blue denims or brown oxfords, roll ‘em up boys. These will pair amazingly with that pair of high top sneakers you’ve wanted to hit mags with.
Statement Scarves: I know this one is a stretch for most of you that aren’t Aris, but statement scarves can make your ensemble heat up as the temperatures drop.
And he’s really into cool Japanese brand Talking About The Abstraction:
Japanese label, Talking About The Abstraction, just released their Spring/Summer lookbook, and boys, THIS IS HUGE. Start putting the spare change in the piggy bank if you want to look like a high roller. Link below, but remember, I am not liable for your computer’s water damage when you begin to drool over the keyboard.
In regards to what he isn’t into, well, just read for yourself:
One in particular has been bugging me so I’ll just come out with it, dress pants need to be hemmed. When you are sporting formal wear the most important thing is not threadcount (sorry Jaffe), but FIT! So find a local tailor and clean it up. This message holds true even if you are going to a date party with that cute Theta or headed to that interview with Bain.
While these rules seem easy enough to follow, the author’s main point seems to be this: look like a “high roller” and you’ll be good to go, bro.