Ryan Lochte Designs Speedo Swim Cap for Charity, Rubs Nipples

Lochte describes his design as "a Ryan Lochte cap! It's... jeah!"
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Nora Crotty
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Lochte describes his design as "a Ryan Lochte cap! It's... jeah!"

It's happening, you guys: Ryan Lochte's fashion design career is gaining steam.

The 11-time Olympic medalist, who typically spends his days giving embarrassing interviews, risking his livelihood to please crazed female fans, racing with Prince Harry in Vegas, watching Cool Runnings and making it impossible for me to find any man who could possibly measure up in my heart, has also somehow found the time to co-design a limited-edition Speedo swim cap with artist Dave Kinsey. It's part of the swimwear brand's new 'Art of the Cap' campaign. All proceeds from the $20 cap will benefit a non-profit organization helping to fight Duchenne, a form of muscular dystrophy, and a cause Lochte's supported for several years.

Luckily for all of us, a shirtless Lochte shot the above promotional video for the partnership, in which he declares his purpose ("I'm Ryan Lochte!"), rubs and squeezes his pecs, tells us about a bill he "peditioned," shows off cute pics of his trip to "talk to all the senators," while explaining how "nervous-wracking" the whole experience was. His efforts not only changed lives, but also made me love him even more.

As far as the cap's design is concerned, Lochte chose a green, yellow, and black argyle because GREEN'S HIS FAVORITE COLOR! and also because his signature Ryan Lochte sneakers were similarly colored so he decided he's "gonna stick with that." And after all was said and done, the end result (according to Lochte, himself) was "a Ryan Lochte cap! It's... jeah!" Be still our hearts.