We’ve never watched Beauty and the Geek, so we have no idea who Gregory Paul Soriano is.

But our attention was recently turned to him anyway, because apparently he’s a master baker, and often makes crazy cakes as an ode to fashion.

So check out his best one, which he’s titled “The World’s Most Expensive Cake, the Marc Jacobs/Louis Vuitton Tribute Patchwork Cake.”

We’re impressed.

And kind of spooked.

And we want to eat the gold chain.