Ashish’s show program said it better than I ever could:

“Never one for subtlety, our heroine is dressed to kill (literally) with a wardrobe that reads like the greatest hits of a holiday brochure. She has a dress to match every cocktail shaken in the Panorama Bar [of the HMS Queen Camilla), and after one daquiri too many, you may well find her draped across the grand piano, resplendent in a hibiscus flowered sequined wrap.

“Her taste reflects her destinations, like a Satnov in sequins she wears a map of Italy with more finesse than a Berlusconi babe and in Paris she glitters, like a living Tour Eiffel, or her halter ego the Mona Lisa, but with added lip gloss…

“On shore there’s scant difference, shredded t-shirts pay homage to her heroine Bo Derek, and as an ardent Facebook devotee, she’ll frequently post images to her envious friends back home in sequined souvenir t-shirts - not that she even cares if she sees them again.”

And there you have it.

Fashion and tennis have always shared a special bond: Coco Chanel, Lacoste, Anna and Roger.

Today marks the beginning of the most fashionable, in our opinion, of all the Grand Slams - Wimbledon. It must be noted that I am a huge tennis fan and much like Ms. Wintour, I have much affection for Mr. Federer. Though, unfortunately I do not get the chance to frequently jet to his matches.

I look forward to seeing what the people at Nike come up with for him every year for this tournament. It’s always dapper and ultra chic, like this jacket in the picture, though the cardigan sweater from last year might be my favorite.

I simply swoon over the classic gentlemanly touches and the retro feel. It just sums up everything that I think Wimbledon should be sartorially.

Maybe he can throw some advice about subtlety in fashion choices Serena Williams’ way if they cross paths at Centre Court, because we’re a little unsure about the gold pants as well as some of her on-court choices.

Do you prefer the classic look or something a little jazzier on the court? If you like tennis, that is.

Pop Quiz!

This really weird video that starts out with Taylor Momsen and ends with an equally bleached blonde stunt double is:

a) Part of Nike’s new underground campaign - note gratuitous shots of Little J’s sports bra’s swish and insanely bright Nike sneakers.

b) Part three of Gossip Girl’s sneaker invasion, Ed for KSwiss, Leighton for Reebok? (Can Chace land Puma? Will Blake follow up her Vogue cover with an Adidas campaign? Will someone on Gossip Girl actually wear sneakers?)

c) The missing part of Taylor’s awkward Teen Vogue gym story (in which she’s also rocking Nikes)?

d) Part of something we don’t know about, and you’re going to tell us…

Let’s call it The Sartorialist Effect:

After years of tiny flowers dotting the fabric of Paul Smith shirts, the motif seems to be stretching into more men’s fashion - most specifically, and surprisingly, into men’s streetwear.

You can find floral guys’ shirts at H&M now, and floral ties at Steven Alan and Urban Outfitters.

But our most surprising find were these red sneakers from Nike, which feature tiny dotted blossoms all over their leather fields, at Opening Ceremony (Ok - so they’re sized for women, but the store purposely carries up to a women’s 12 - which is a men’s 10 - especially for boy shoppers.)

The kicks retail for $125, and if a boy wore them out on a date with us, we’d be kinda psyched.

Would you?

Keeping with their trademark of reporting on a trend too late,yesterday’s New York Times reported on the increasing popularity of customized footwear.

After the success of design-your-own-shoe sites like Nike ID and Tupli, Steve Madden has joined the action, creating an option for customers to design their own fanciful footwear.

The article features a shoe-loving guy who made a pair of custom Steve Maddens for his girlfriend’s birthday online:

“Starting with her size, 9, he clicked through the site to select a style, heel and color, putting together a navy gingham open-toe pump with cork heel and sole that Mr. Klemm thought “would look good with everything from jeans to dresses.”

We’d be dubious if our boyfriend bought us a pair of Steve Madden shoes for our birthday, but even more: We find the idea of our boyfriend designing our shoes fairly horrifying - unless he sticks to Vans or Converse, or something very cool and easy.

But maybe if he customized a tote bag inspired by the Fendi canvas clutch, we’d like it a little better…

—ALISON COOL