Ten Random Thoughts About the Project Runway Finale Show

So I have a confession to make: I really love Project Runway. As I sat and watched all the personalities file in and Heidi with her mom-shag and suit of indeterminate color (red? coral? fire orange?) take the stage, I was as giddy as a 13-year-old who’s been waiting six hours for Justin Bieber. It’s just damn good entertainment. I make no apologies for my uncoolness. Obviously there are still several weeks of Project Runway to air before the finale show. So ten designers showed full collections today as a decoy, because the public can’t possibly be trusted with such high-level information as who the real three finalists are. The Theatre at Lincoln Center was a madhouse before the show. I saw the staff kick a pregnant woman out of a seat because it was for the sponsors. Despite her plea to allow them to let her stay until someone claimed the seat, they hauled her up and out of there.

So I have a confession to make: I really love

The usual celeb suspects were front and center. Joanna Coles, Nina Garcia, Michael Kors, Harvey Weinstein, Betsey Johnson. Randomly, Jordin Sparks and Tyson Beckford--snapping gum and shooting pics paparazzi-style--were there, too. And the finale guest judge? Jessica Simpson. Sigh. She was wearing a very loose, spangled silver dress with cutout sleeves, looked very tan, and had a nice tidy ponytail.

Going through all ten shows would be boring, so allow me to make Ten Random Thoughts instead:

1) After very unscientific observation, it seemed like the judges scribbled the most notes for Michael D, Christopher, Ivy, and Gretchen. Are any of these the finalists?

2) The music at Michael C’s show, which consisted of bronze-mauve satin and feather monstrosities, was club beats over a woman’s voice breathily saying, “Michael Costello.” Creepy.

3) Casanova’s collection was dedicated to his grandmother. It was all slinky tight satin pants and sequins. No plush puppies, as he assured us there wouldn’t be.

4) Valerie was WAY too perky and described her collection as “Rainbow Brite and David Bowie’s love child.” I was kind of loving her sharpie-colored dresses, which had a slight Christopher Kane for Versus vibe.

5) Gretchen claimed that she had experienced a lot of growth and self-discovery. Her collection was called, “Running Through Thunder.” Moss, 70s, and earthy was the theme.

6) Mondo’s collection was full of crazy graphics shot through with hot pink. I probably wouldn’t wear any of it, but loved looking at it. Betsey Johnson was all smiles. 7) I didn’t see Tim Gunn, which was very sad. I can’t wait to see the backstage footage. However, his new book was part of the swag bag. This saves me the embarrassment of actually going to the store and purchasing it, which I totally would have done.

8) Michael D’s collection was really great. He was inspired by x-rays and Rothko. Beautiful golds, blacks, and burnout fabrics.

9) Jessica Simpson looked very uncomfortable the whole time. I’m worried about her.

10) The people sitting next to me didn’t know anyone’s names. You’re welcome.