It seems like Kate and William’s big Royal Wedding was just yesterday — when we were analyzing the now-Duchess of Cambridge’s Sarah Burton for Alexander McQueen’s wedding dress from every angle, marveling over the second one and discovering little sis Pippa and her stunning behind, along with the rest of the world. Aren’t royal weddings fun? So to properly celebrate Kate and Wills’ April 29th one-year anniversary, instead of poring over a year’s worth of past fashion moments, let’s plant the seed for the next royal extravaganza instead: Harry’s wedding. While William is handsome, proper and refined — like the second in line to the throne should be — Harry just seems like a lot more fun to hang with at the party. What history (and a quick Google search) have taught us, the lucky lady doesn’t have to be a Brit or a royal, can be a divorcee and, if she’s not a member of the Church of England, she can just convert if the Ginger Fox wants third dibs on being King. But there’s a more serious matter at hand. Considering the precedent set by Kate Middleton, the future royal wife better have some major fashion skills. So which one of these fashion-y young ladies would look best in a demure, long-sleeved wedding dress?
Lana Del Rey The latest rumor is that Prince Harry has been hooking up with Sienna Miller look-alike and lead singer of Brit girl group the Saturdays, Mollie King. Taking his recent interest in the musical arts in mind, we’d like to suggest a blind date with “self-styled gangsta Nancy Sinatra” Lana Del Rey. So the March Vogue UK cover girl needs to work on her public appearances and maybe not wear see-through shirts while wandering the streets of London anymore, but at least she won’t have to dip into the Royal coffers to support her accessories budget — she has a line of Mulberry bags named after her.
Blake Lively After breaking up with starter boyfriend Penn Badgley and jet setting around the world with modelizer Leonardo Dicaprio, Gossip Girl actress Blake Lively seems to be in a steady relationship with former Green Lantern co-star Ryan Reynolds. No biggie though, considering that the serial ambitious dater would probably jump at the chance to trade up for a royal playboy. (How jealous would Blair be?!) Not sure if she’d be willing to give up her famed Christian Louboutin shoe collection for the people-approved L.K. Bennett high-street designs though.
Kate Upton We know Harry can’t resist a hot blonde and he’s no stranger to controversy (the pot smoking incident followed by “rehab”, that Nazi armband costume thing and, oh, the video with the racist and homophobic remarks…). So he and Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Issue cover girl Kate Upton might just be kindred spirits. Her commercial for Zoo York was banned due to inappropriate “double entendres” and she just pissed off a load of religious people by wearing a trashy-looking bathing suit and nun’s habit as “Sister Bernice” in the Three Stooges reboot. We can’t really imagine how royal family dinner would go with the other Kate, however.
Michelle Dockery She might not be a member of the nobility, but she plays one on TV. Michelle Dockery has made a name for herself playing Downton Abbey’s snooty, but irresistibly likeable Lady Mary Crawley. We’re absolutely obsessed with those beautiful, gossamer-light Edwardian gowns that she wears to regular family dinner nights at the Grantham house. While in real life, Dockery hails from the rough and tumble county of Essex, she works that upper crusty intonation just fine. Plus, her stint on Downton has schooled her in the finer art of aristocratic manners and etiquette. Forget you, Matthew!
Chloe Green Brit-It girl Chloe Green — as in daughter of Topshop tycoon Sir Philip Green, Green — has been in the news lately for starting her own self-named shoe line, CJG. Before that, she’s been gracing the (mostly UK) tabs for dating her bisexual reality TV co-star (um, is that show available on Netflix?) and partying it up with a $10.5 million joint birthday bash with daddy. Not sure if the Queen would approve, but hey, at least you know she wouldn’t be marrying Harry for his money (pops is worth over four billion pounds) and maybe she can get Kate a family discount on some Topshop.
Alexa Chung No list of fashion-forward English girls is complete without the model/TV host/all-around style icon. But considering Chung’s penchant for dating hipster rock stars and general awesomeness, she might be a little too cool for Harry. But how much would we love to see Prince Henry of Wales sloshing around in the mud at Glastonbury (cuz you know he would) or hitting the vintage shops in the East End?
Charlotte Casiraghi Fourth in line to the Monegasque throne, Charlotte Casiraghi is also American royalty — she’s the granddaughter of Hollywood legend Grace Kelly. The Vogue Paris cover girl inherited her grandmother’s sense of style (and drop dead gorgeous looks) and was most recently the star of an equestrian-themed Gucci campaign. Marrying amongst the European royal families is old hat, so done and done. Imagine the beautiful children they’d have. So she has some rumored French actor boyfriend, gaaah. That’s no competition for an heir to the British throne.
Kim Kardashian Hey, practically every single famous man has been linked to the middle Kardashian sister (eh hem, Kanye West), so why not Harry? So she’s a divorcee — twice over. Queen Elizabeth gave Charles permission to marry divorced longtime love Camilla Parker Bowles (and never mind the marriage track record of Prince Charles, Princess Margaret and Prince Andrew), so that’s really a non-issue. We all know how much Kim loves a big, high profile wedding, but not sure if the Queen would be up for E! reality TV cameras all up in the palace.