My Halloween ended abruptly last Friday night at approximately 10:30pm. After days--days!--of scrounging every fast fashion store in the SoHo/NoHo area for the perfect stripy shirt, giganto chandelier earrings, and blonde pixie wig (harder to find than you'd think--get on that, Ricky's), I'd assembled an Edie Sedgwick costume I could be proud of almost bear to have plastered across Facebook. So none of my friends had ever heard of Andy Warhol's drug addled, tortured-souled, long deceased muse--whatever! That's what smart phones are for.
But by some evil coincidence, I wasn't the only one with visions of pantsless factory girls dancing through her head that evening: My Former Party Makeout's Current Party Makeout showed up to the party wearing the exact.same.costume. And she was pissed. We're not talking twin Edie photos and forced LOLing. I know, right? Total awkward turtle, worst-thing-ever. It was unreal. I thought these things only happened on TGIF, too. I just... I can't even.
So that was my Halloween, over before it really had a chance to start. But while I may have theoretically burned my Halloweeny hot pants days ago because of Current Make Out--what about the rest of you who've undoubtedly been saving your clever and only-relevant-in-2012 "restored" Ecce Homo costume or Kimye kostumes for real Halloween (tonight), and will no longer be able to wear them because of Sandy?
I feel for you. And I want to help. True: The loss of a frivolous, free-candy holiday is obviously no great tragedy compared to the loss and devastation caused by this Frankenstorm--but it doesn't hurt to have a little lightness in a seriously dark time (really though, will the lights ever come back on?) And while Sandy may have put a major (pun time!) damper on Halloween, you shouldn't go carpooling back to Party City, receipt in hand, just yet. I'm pretty sure most of that stuff is final sale anyway. Here are a few suggestions to repurposing your unused H'ween costumes:
Here are a few suggestions to repurposing your unused H'ween costumes:
• Vampire blood is an excellent way to recreate the pink eye look from the spring runway. Alternatively can work as a lip stain. • Zombie blood (so my roommate has just informed me) is, in fact, black. BAM! Smokey eye. • That white sheet you repurposed for your Grecian goddess, Animal House, or ghost costume? Yep--you can still sleep on it! • Pretty lacy masks should be saved for Lady Gaga's next masquerade ball. • Scary masks are good for robbing banks (though we aren't endorsing that). • Animal masks are ideal for Furry conventions. • Slutty/ironic post-debate Big Bird costumes can be burned for warmth and light until the electricity comes back on. They are obviously highly flammable. • A binder full of women can easily convert to a binder full of paper to burn for warmth and light until the electricity comes back on. • Wear your strap-on pregnancy belly for a Labor Pains-type prank on your co-workers. Hilarity may or may not ensue. • Clown wigs can and should be worn to scare small children at birthday parties or otherwise. • Full-on witch costumes are now appropriate to wear in public year-round. • Same goes for those brainwave-controlled cat ears you got for your Choupette Lagerfeld get-up.
Unlike Mayor Bloomberg, I'm unfortunately unable to summarize the above in Spanish at this time. But I hope my suggestions have helped lift your spirits (including the scary ones that generally come out on October 31) that have all but been drowned away by Sandy's unpleasant arrival. She may have crashed our Halloween party this time around--but think of these (literally) dark days as a bonus to get even more creative with your costume next year! And if my tragic tale isn't motivation enough... I'm not sure what is.