Welcome to Shop It Out!, a series dedicated to answering life's big, messy questions in the only way we know how: with shopping.
Q: I just discovered that Holland Taylor and Sarah Paulson are dating, having recently made their red carpet debut together, and now I'm sweating uncontrollably and freaking out. They are the coolest couple imaginable, and I'm sitting here smiling and crying at the same time, so full of joy and fear that I'll never find a love this rad. How do I cope?
In Love With Love
Tell us about it! When it came to our attention in December that these two stunning women were dating, it blew our damn minds. For those just tuning in: Sarah Paulson, an actress on "American Horror Story," who also appeared in "12 Years a Slave" and "Carol," is one of those under-the-radar yet beloved stars who delivers solid performances year after year. Meanwhile, Holland Taylor is a legend with an IMDB page longer than Ariana Grande's extensions. But you might best recognize her as the scary-as-shit Professor Stromwell in “Legally Blonde,” who kicked Elle Woods out of class at the beginning, then later coming back on her team with the iconic line, "If you're going to let one stupid prick ruin your life, you're not the girl I thought you were." Yes. More recently she played the legendary Texan governor Ann Richards in a one-woman Broadway show.
It wasn't until Dec. 1, 2015 that we learned Taylor is actually part of a two-woman show IRL. She and Paulson have the most #goals relationship in Hollywood — nay, the world. Why? Because it is delightfully surprising, aesthetically cohesive and features an age difference that initially leaves you kind of scandalized but then you realize that because they don't care, neither do you. Like with Kate Hudson and Nick Jonas. Or Mary-Kate Olsen and the French raisin. Did we say raisin? We meant raison d'être.
"If Sarah and Holland have a combined 114 years of award-winning talent between them, and they were born 32 years apart, how old are Sarah and Holland?" — a question on the only kind of math exam we'd ever want to take might read. After a little tinkering around with basic algebra and then consulting Wikipedia, we arrived at the correct answer: Holland Taylor is 73 and Sarah Paulson is 41. Impressive, shocking, lit.
But seriously, someone give these women a Givenchy campaign, because the most striking feature of this love story may be how truly compatible their styles are. Paulson has a prim, ladylike look, gravitating toward full-skirted dresses punched up with fun textures and prints. Taylor prefers silk sheath skirts with matching jackets and long-sleeved dresses with a presidential vibe, if the president were allowed to wear a slit up to there. These two women's style auras vibrate next to each other like snow white and eggshell paint chips; Hamilton and Burr, sir; bedtime and Instagram; an article about Eileen Myles in the New York Times and then another article about Eileen Myles in the New York Times three days later; Michael B. Jordan and suits. Next to the other, each shines brighter. When you look at Holland Taylor and Sarah Paulson on the red carpet, you feel cocooned by the completeness of their dressing. You believe in love. Actually.
How do you cope with that? Remember that not everything is a trap, and that you don't need to do the mental gymnastics of transforming your excitement about a budding romance into distrust. Google Image search them, build a shrine to #Paulland in your closet, get an IMDB Pro account to get in touch with their people — do whatever, but don't get creepy. Because how often does a total respite from the frigid emotional tundra of human apathy come along? Lean into it, and perhaps invest in the following:
1. Stella McCartney "Emma" satin and crêpe dress, available at MyTheresa: While this hemline is shorter than a typical Holland/Sarah frock, its flirty shape is still regal and pure, channeling a "presidential princess" vibe for those who are young and optimistic in every sense — hopeful about love, hopeful about claiming their place in our democracy.
2. Tiffany T Wire Bracelet, $1,600, available at Tiffany: This love shackle symbolizes the great merger of two kindred souls through metalwork.
3. Gianluca Capannolo "Kim" coat, $1027.15, available at Farfetch: Behind every great woman... is a maternal cocoon coat. This bright red one makes us think of feminine power and menstruation. Yes, we realize that's redundant.
4. Gucci Soho Hobo large textured-leather shoulder bag, $1,980, available at Net-a-Porter: A bag large enough to accommodate your chapstick, tampons and a multitude of dazzling, ever-changing female feelings.
5. Delfina Delettrez 18-karat gold multi-stone earring, $1,750, available at Net-a-Porter: Freshwater pearls and green and pink topaz stones are a surprising and unexpectedly good combination. Do you see what we're getting at here?
6. Gucci fringed suede pumps, $790, available at Net-a-Porter: Timeless Italian footwear in honor of a timeless love affair. But like, a sexy one.
7. Nars Audacious Lipstick in "Greta," $33, available at Sephora: Last name Garbo. First name Greatest.